Vulnerable Moments

Hello to my guarded fallen angels! Today was Christmas Day so instead of indulging in my self-pity, like I usually do, I decided to get out the house to hang out with some other young adults in DMHAS. The other clients are fake af. I don’t trust them at all. So the day started off with lunch at Home Town Buffet. I’m friendly with the girls like most gay men are but they were very odd today. It was the usual me-pretending-to-hit-on-them-to-make-the-guys-jealous bit. Dumbing-myself-down-to-associate-with-my-age-group bit. There was this one girl who was pregnant with her Nth child saying she was gonna plot to destroy one of her baby daddies. Yeah… what good is gonna come out of that, am I right? Geez… Then this other girl kept saying things in explicit detail about giving birth while I was eating. I didn’t like that. Also, the guys were observing me for some reason. I felt like the main attraction, “The Lone Homo Exhibit” and shit… I’m the only gay man in the whole program so the other guys usually avoid me or laugh at my dark, humorous jokes. The girls started talking about sex which is a topic I can definitely relate to. I indirectly mentioned that I do one-night-stands with guys I don’t know, which is true. They made these weird faces, even the guys, when I joked about it. So we can talk about nasty straight sex but the second I mention gay sex, it’s weird. And I know for a fact those bitches are hoes too. Today was very weird. Then at one point, I say it’s better off being single and alone but this one guy who knows me a tiny bit better than everyone else, replies that I actually hate being alone. I really didn’t like that for some reason. They kept watching me eat and commenting on every gesture or small movement I did. I usually complain about feeling invisible but maybe invisibility is a blessing and not a curse. I act so arrogant and bitchy around my peers and I was so in that zone that I forgot my “purse” (it’s really just one of those bags with a drawstring) when we left to go to the movie theatre. I was in the middle of watching the latest Star Wars movie when I suddenly realized my “purse” wasn’t on me. I went into the lobby to call one of the staff members to ask if they knew where my “purse” was. They assured me that they found it and put it in their state vehicle for me to get after the movie. The thing is, we all dispersed to watch different movies so our movies ended at different times. The staff I spoke to on the phone before I finished watching The Force Awakens called me back 8 times in a two minute timespan while my phone was on silent. I returned her call but she said she couldn’t wait for me any longer so she left. WTF, right? So the other staff member I’m actually a lot closer to was still in the movie theatre and there were several issues that occurred around the same time. I eventually got my “purse” back but still… Weird days like this makes me very grateful that I have an uneventful, dramaless, lonely life after all. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Let’s be negative!

Hello to my negative fallen angels! I’m gonna talk some real shit today because I genuinely don’t give a fuck and I need to vent. I can’t see my therapist this week because of stupid ass Thanksgiving. This is the time of the month my food stamps are gone and people make plans with me and then ditch me at the last minute. So when people ask me what I’m doing for Thanksgiving, I say starving and contemplating suicide. Lol. I hate the holiday season! More like Suicide Season! I’m the fucking love child of Mr. Scrooge and the Grinch. There’s always those dumbass Christmas specials on TV and annoying children getting spoiled and becoming worse and worse every year. I can’t do yoga or meditation as well as my empathic rituals barefooted at my local park because now it’s too cold outside. My ex-fiance’s birthday is in December too. And my crush keeps hanging me on a hook. I hate this shit! Ungrateful people smiling and laughing in each other’s company as if they give a fuck about each other. I have no faith nor expectations in other people anymore so when someone fails to comply, I am not disappointed. Loneliness is the realest thing there is and I must be content with the darkness that is mankind. My boss is fake too! Warmline ain’t shit! No one’s calling and she’s a condescending bitch! It’s a fake job led by a fake person. I bet she was one of those blonde cheerleaders who gossip and pour pig’s blood on dark beauty queens. The kind of girl in high school whose boyfriend I fucked last night. I’m trying to get a real job but I guess no one is really hiring. Lol. My brother is getting back with his bitch ass fiance so I’m not talking to him anytime soon. I hope the world ends soon though. It sucked when mankind continued to live past 2012. I mention 2012 a lot but seriously, I was SO FUCKING DISAPPOINTED THAT THE END OF THE WORLD NEVER HAPPENED! Humans don’t deserve to live. Whatever. I gotta wait it out, I guess. I have been working out three times a week but I’m still curvy as fuck. I really enjoyed doing drag last Wednesday though. I have pictures and wrote a draft for my post about my alter-drag ego, Seductress. However, the video for ComiQueens is still in the works of being edited. So once I gather pics and vids, I will post it immediately. And my church family is pretty cool. So maybe there are a few reasons to continue tolerating living amongst human beings as an alien attempting but failing to take over the world time and time again. No one in my life bothers reading my blog, but even if they did… oh wells! The infamous One-Eyed Angel resumes his existence in pursuit of a fabled salvation. Wish me luck and I will wish you luck too – as if that matters at all. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂