Through The Peephole

image

Her eye spies through the peephole
Strange and unusual men
Exiting his home after they reach their goal,
Never to be seen again.

She had once thought
He was a good young man,
The one who lives across the hall.

They had once been very close
Until she became a nuisance.
Now he evades her like a ghost.

Her eye spies through the peephole
The police banging on his door.
It seems that the law has taken its toll
What were they here for him for?

She had once thought
He was a good young man,
The one who lives across the hall.

They were once there for each other
Until she went too far.
Now he doesn’t even bother.

Her eye spies through the peephole
As he leaves behind his chamber
To live his life playing an innocent role,
Fooling others like he fooled her.

She had once thought
He was a good young man,
The one who lives across the hall.

They were once best friends
Until he moved on from her.
Now her ancient life descends.

So her eye spies through the peephole
Because it’s all she’ll ever see.
Her golden years are lonely and dull
While his life is wild and free.

Feel free to check my latest book, a book of poetry called Trials and Tribulations! http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B018ZR0IVA/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1460319936&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=trials+and+tribulations+sufian

Faithful Forevermore

Hello to my faithful fallen angels! Let’s climb aboard for another one of The One-Eyed Angel’s check-ins, shall we? There were a select group of friends I would text every single morning. I felt like I was doing all the work after a while. So I stopped texting them first to see if they would reach out to me and I ultimately lost touch with them.

Honestly I think I’m losing touch with my brother too. He seems apathetic since he broke up with his ex-fiance. He had a kid with her but it doesn’t seem like he cares. So I try not take it personally. But I was on the receiving end of a lover’s apathy. Hence it’s nearly impossible to not empathize with his ex-fiance and the daughter he left behind. He’s a good brother and a good person to me, but he’s not inclined to maintain a family dynamic. I get it though. I think I would have done the same thing, to be honest. She was far from perfect herself. It can go either way when it concerns me.

It just sucks how hurt people tend to hurt people. Most people want to unload their burden onto someone else. Just because I have my shit together, people assume I’m always okay. But I’m human too. Not many of my friends are people I could confide in if I need support. They’re always busy or they’re in the company of someone more important. I think people are naturally selfish honestly. It takes strength and compassion to care about someone other than yourself.

Aside from my psychological perplexity, my vessel is in need of repair. I have been taking pain killers every single day for years due to chronic neck and back problems. The diplopia isn’t quite a pleasant experience either. I hope there’s a solution to my physical anomalies. As of this point in my life, every problem has been solved or in the process of being solved. So my faith resides forevermore in God.

But I get a bit cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs when I skip meditation and other spiritual practices. A visit to the spirit realm always cures my crazies. If I stop laughing, I’d be crying. So I laugh, pop pain killers, and practice abstinence to stay alive. Ode to joy!

Hope always find its way in. I have obtained a friendship with a neighbor I honestly didn’t think I would establish any kind of relationship with. My brother shows me that he still has a heart from time to time. I have known one of my best friends for several years now and she’s someone who actually has an aptitude to acknowledge how and why I am the way I am. Yet no matter how much I divulge myself to you all, I will forever remain a mystery. On that beautiful note, I wish you all a wonderful day! Over and out.

image

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Tip of the Iceberg

Good morning to my mysterious fallen angels! How was your labor day weekend? So have you noticed my poetic prowess has been greatly improved since my blog was first established? I read my own “past endeavors” (archives) and even my own writing gives me goosebumps. I noticed one of my older poems, Triskelion, still gets checked out at least once everyday by some of my unknown fallen angels since it was originally posted back in the beginning of this Summer. My personal favorite poems are Kamikaze Burlesque and Loneliness and guilty pleasures. I felt confident enough to explore my sexuality with you all in my poems after experimenting with these two specific posts to see how you would react. A lot of likes but a very few comments on either of them. To be expected. Ha! Some of my newer additions to my collection; The Scarlet Harlot and Unquenched Desire; display my more vulnerable takes on love. You’re probably wondering why this post reminds you of those flashback shows in certain tv series where all they do is show clips of past episodes, huh? Well, I wanted to enforce my explanation of how I view myself. A paranoid yet lonely sociopath who just wants to be left alone. Well that’s not entirely true, to be honest. I just want to be loved. Now is that so bad? Clique… But I feel like no matter how many poems, random reviews, or check-ins I post, it will always be the tip of the iceberg! I have no doubt many other bloggers feel the same way. Like I can never fully pour my heart and soul into the depths of my blog 100%. Maybe I’m just naturally mysterious. Perhaps if I spoke in clear English rather than through prose, I can make you see who I really am. Yeah, cus I’m wrong like that… Perhaps I should get out my house more… Society is more inclined to the likes of Facebook posts rather than blog posts. It seems like people would rather video record me trip or cuss someone out than for me to confuse them with my philosophical mind. Not many people want to read intellectual works of literature anymore. A lot of people I come across in public don’t wanna know how I’m doing or become my friend. I notice the only times humans interact with me are when they need something. Sex. Labor. Laughter. Money. [As stated in leave me alone I’m lonely] One or a combination of those four things. No one ever wants to know how I’m doing even if I ask them first. You can never know someone 100%. The belief that you can is faulty. We are all subject to vested interest. We are all alone in our own minds.

So back to the topic at hand, I take pride that my writing is getting better even though my social life isn’t. Luckily, I can say in all honesty that I love you all, my fallen angels! I had made friends with some of you and I have never been more real than I have been with you. Thank you so much for taking interest in my blog! I’m never gonna stop. I’m gonna keep it coming. So stay tuned for more posts in the future! Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Standing by for fun…

Good morning to my misunderstood fallen angels! It’s been a while since I last posted something other than poetry, random reviews, and reblogs. For that, I humbly repent. So let’s get to it, shall we? After my first heartbreak, I’m not really in a rush to get my heart broken again. So I sit idly by as all my friends are all in relationships. But looking back, the fact that I even have friends now is quite an accomplishment on my behalf. And also another fact that I went from dealing with hardcore issues to mere high school shit is a blessing in disguise. Yeah, I may be single and lonely but I’m focusing on myself. I’m getting my driver’s license this Thursday and I started my second semester in college today. Apart from those goals reached, I also have a job now as a Suicide Warmline Operator. It’s just I’m so proud of myself. And I deserve it because I have been through so much. Besides, all my past relationships were unhealthy and affected me severely. And I’m saving up for a car. So I’m not gonna bother wasting money on dates where they just end badly anyway. Money that would better suit me in the long run if I just save it. I am at my best at this point in my life and when I fall in love, I fall hard. But at the end of it all, I have no regrets whatsoever. Hardship is the only way to strengthen the soul, I always say. I’ve survived worse. I’m keeping myself busy now that my Summer is over. I don’t see it as running away from my problems or repressing my feelings. I see it more as staying proactive, acknowledging my past and how it affects me to this day, and trying to move forward with my life. God takes someone out of your life to make room for someone better. That’s what I always tell myself. And a life without goals or purpose is a life not worth living. That’s why I keep it moving. I also realize that although not even my friends can understand me, no one will ever fully understand ever. To expect people to fully fathom my existence would be foolish. That’s too much expectations on anyone. And to be honest, I don’t want people, even the closest people to me, to figure out my mystery because anyone can betray me. I am only in complete control over myself. I am okay with that. So with that paranoia-infected note, I hope you all have a wonderful day! Over and out.

image

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Samus Aran: Bounty Huntress

Watch “Samus Aran (Metroid): The Story You Never Knew” on YouTube

Hello my drowsy fallen angels! Today’s post is a bit different than my usual ones. This is about the Metroid series from Nintendo. Nintendo has three mascots, not just Mario. These icons represent past, present, and future. Link (The Legend of Zelda) represents the past, Mario represents the present, and Samus Aran (Metroid) represents the future. My favorite of the three is obviously Samus. I attached a YouTube video about the origin of Samus Aran: Bounty Huntress. She is so beautiful. I think if the protagonist of the Metroid series was a guy, I wouldn’t be as interested. Which is ironic because I’m not attracted to women lol. Guys go crazy for Zero Suit Samus. But I prefer her in her Varia Suit for a less than ironic reason. She’s so strong and resilient. Her backstory is the darkest out of the majority of all other Nintendo characters. Usually blonde women in cartoons or video games are airheads or damsels in distress, but Samus broke that cliche into pieces. Samus Aran is so mysterious which intrigues me even more. In a way, she reminds me of myself. Resilience and beauty. I can definitely relate to those things. Her mystery shrouds her ever so lovely. With the exception of The Other M, which made her look weak and undesirable. Anyway, check out the vid and tell me what you think. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

image

Young and Mysterious…

Hello to my fallen angels! And any new recruits, I might add. It’s funny how people perceive me in many different ways. Older men see me as “innocent, young, naive.” Older women see me as “adorable, young, naive.” Professionals see me as “vibrant, young, naive.” My peers see me as “emo, mysterious, lonely.” My loved ones see me as “strong, resilient, funny.” So my postulate is older strangers think I am a child while young adults my own age think I am a vampire. Only the ones closest to me are more near the target of who I truly am yet even they are not fully right. Who am I? Who are you? Why, as a society, why do we label each other to establish some fictitious place in the world? I may be mysterious to most but maybe it is because I do not divulge my past endeavors or my personal life to every person I come across just to add on to the imaginary order of things. I am entitled to my own self-worth and comparing myself to anyone else will not make me any better or any worse of a person in the grand scheme of things.

“Life is not measured in years but in how many lives we touch.”
– Peeta Mallark, Catching Fire.

So true, but drama composes of touching many lives… in a negative way. So what is better? Drama or discretion? So yeah, you can label me any way you want if that makes you feel good about yourself. But do not expect me to trust you then. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.