Celebrating The Life Of Sara

 

I was too afraid to speak up at your memorial so I wrote this for you:

I didn’t know you that well, Sara, but everyone’s stories helped me piece together an idea of who you were. So many people care about you. You were always out there meeting new people who automatically became friends with you. You taught me that being dark isn’t as powerful as being an angel. I wanna be just like you. Friendly. Loving. Positive. And everything else wonderful that made you who you were. I wish I got to know you better. I’m glad I got to find out as much as I could from the people’s lives you touched. I hate myself sometimes for joking about death and suicide. I’m sorry that my dark humor is the only thing keeping me from falling apart. I tend to overlook other people and assume that I’m the only one who hurts. I always wonder why not many people pay attention to me or why their faces never light up when I walk into a room. Now I understand it’s because I don’t put myself out there in the community like you did. You were amazing! You went to so many events to spread awareness and even spoke in front of politicians about mental health equality! You always smiled so I never thought you were going through so much that you would end your life the way you did. You once told me that you were fascinated with how I am. But now it’s easier to admit that I’m fascinated with how you were too. I can never be nearly as caring and kind to people like you used to be. I have been hurt by others so many times that I tend to put my earbuds on just to have an excuse not to hear them. I drown the world out with music. Now, I feel like all the emotions I have repressed for so long are spilling out like a tsunami. It’s unbearable. Why did you die and not me? I know if I continue to remain the same, I will continue to miss opportunities to know other aspiring people like you. I doubt my memorial service will be nearly as populated as yours were when I die someday. So one of my new goals in life is to positively affect so many lives that people will care enough to love me the way they loved you. You will be missed and it was a pleasure meeting you, my dear.

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Sara was even on TV making a difference in this world for the better.

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(From left to right: me, Lyne, Sara, and Caspian) At last year’s Toivo’s ProHealing Festival

 

Feel free to like and comment on this post and I will do the same for you. Also, please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B012BSPFCQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1452971409&sr=1-1&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70&keywords=The+Pandemonium+Chronicles

Monday, Tuesday, busy days! Wednesday, Thursday, busy days!

As Day 15 of Blogging101, I have declared every Wednesday from now on to be Check-In Wednesday. It’s a regular weekly feature on my blog. Enjoy!

Hello to my time-consumed fallen angels! It’s been a little while since my last post. Sorry about that. I know some of my fellow bloggers have become my regulars and I am truly grateful for their ongoing interest within my aegis loft. Anyway, my third semester at my college started last week so I have been busy a lot more lately. Full-time student, part-time worker looking for a better job. Love life is still a mess. However, I have a date next week with this guy I liked since I met him in the beginning of last semester. He recently got a boyfriend but I won a date with him fair and square. You see, because of my charming self, I challenged him to a Pokemon battle. We’re both into Pokemon and I thought that if I stayed within common interests, I’ll be able to get his attention. I beat him without cheating or anything. Despite him losing, he looked so happy. He has doubts about his boyfriend and he admitted he likes me too. So my love life may be getting better after all. Overall, I’m finally moving forward. I’m working on myself. School. Work. Dates. Church. Gym. Friends. Life. I love being busy. I love this human experience I am embarking on. I’m not afraid of death. I wouldn’t mind dying. But now I can wait for my last breath. I’m learning not to be afraid of living anymore. So get out there in the world and make something of yourself! We all have something to offer! Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like and comment on this post and I will do the same for you. Also, please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B012BSPFCQ/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1452971409&sr=1-1&pi=AC_SX110_SY165_QL70&keywords=The+Pandemonium+Chronicles

Salvation VI

Salvation:
I II III IV V

I really admire the people who are closer towards pursuing their own salvation than I am.
There’s no need to be envious or to posthaste.
It’s harder to chant the truth that I’m ahead of some like some are of me.
The pursuit of happiness isn’t a race.
It’s a herd of lamb led by a shepherd.
Our wool upon our backs vary in weight.
Our hooves are different in girth and shape.
However it’s our goals that allow us to persevere through our shortcomings.
We’re all born in glass houses and opposable thumbs make it effortless to throw stones.
Look at how imperfect we are!
Blurred silhouettes of lamb-men hybrids consumed by the desire to be normal.

Nothing But Bluebirds From Now On

Earn merit
You’ll inherit
A benign spirit
But I can’t bear it
Always easier said than done;
Nothing but bluebirds from now on.
Ebb & flow down the waterfall
Wait a year to drop a ball
Not even a single call
Metaphorical wall;
If it’s wetter,
It’s better.
I’m the same
Myself to blame
Alone I have came
Like a single player game
Always easier said than done;
Nothing but bluebirds from now on.
Meander through the crime scene
My eyes before weren’t as keen
This is why I’m so mean
Like a troubled teen;
If it’s tethered,
It’s better.
One day
It’ll be okay
Too young to decay
Young enough to go play
Always easier said than done;
Nothing but bluebirds from now on.
Wavelengths with jagged edges
No point trimming hedges
Hanging off ledges
Of hairy wedges
If it’s sharper,
It’s better.
Earn merit
You’ll inherit
A benign spirit
But I can’t bear it
Always easier said than done…

Spring Smiles

We share a smile.
Not flirtatious;
Not grim;
But a genuine smile.
He strums happy tunes on his grand guitar.
I don’t have much money but I still manage to drop some shiny silver coins into his fedora placed neatly on the ground.
I nod a silent hello while never deviating from my course of routine.
Nice Spring days are perfect for his business.
However, sometimes someone gives him a hard time.
I calm the situation to have them go their separate ways.
He thanks me with a nod.
But I am so glad he is okay that I give him a warm hug instead.
He’s caught off-guard at first until he smiles as he hugs me back.
I barely sleep these days.
The rain is pouring heavily outside.
I don’t have to leave the house today yet I grab my umbrella and head out the door.
I am going to finally introduce myself to my best friend.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Salvation V

No one is worthless.
We all play a key role in this material world outside The Cave.
No one is doltish.
An area of expertise to you may render someone else incapable.
Your IQ points may weigh a ton but there’s no room in that grandiose brain of yours for social skills.
But the person sitting beside you on the bus has so many friends yet fail every test you perceive as effortless.
No one is incompetent.
We can learn so much from each other if we just set aside our differences.
Let’s allow ourselves to fill in the gaps of our imperfections with someone else’s talents while their inadequacies alleivate the burden of your beautiful, lonesome mind.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Salvation III

Both the vulnerable and the secure possess fear of being found out.
May our human compassion for one another end injustice and give our society a more human face.
Fallen heroes and broken villains seek love beyond their reach.
Everything is said and done yet time only moves forward –
It never looks back to intervene with our inevitable mortality.
So there’s no need to hold a grudge rivaling my bittersweet desolation.
My sincerest apologies could never phase through the walls of an unopened mind.
Don’t be afraid of me.
Don’t be ashamed.
Walk in the way of my soft resurrection.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Salvation II

I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings –
However I can’t save you from your morbid cynicism.
I humbly repent for my sins in nostalgic recollection of a felicitous truth.
This world of forms is full of endless possibilities.
Each living entity has an entirely unique experience.
The sights they see, the sounds they hear.
The lives they live are so labyrinthine… and yet so unadorned.
Because you’re something extraordinary.
You’re a human being.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Empath for Beginners

https://www.facebook.com/groups/600262470039580/

My favorite page on Facebook! Empath for Beginners is for newly realized Empaths who provide support, answers to questions, and encouragement to control our abilities. I learned so much from this group. I’m so glad there are good pages on Facebook that prevent me from making a general assumption that Facebook is bad. Lol. I love you all, my fallen angels! Love hard. Live fully. Laugh weirdly. Just be yourself. Keep an open mind for that is the best way people can truly connect to each other on a deep level. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Watch “Empath Daily Meditation” on YouTube

Start your day right. For anyone who wakes up in the morning with racing thoughts and worries like I do, I recommend that you meditate to this audio recording. If it can work for me, it can work for you too. Have a wonderful day, my fallen angels! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂