Between Two Neighbors

 

To my right lives Esperanza:

Something about her summons the demon within me as we raze hell

Is it her skin,

So alabaster –

As if she doesn’t have an expiration date?

Or is it her obsidian curls –

Tendrils of darkness drawing me into her world?

Whatever it is,

Esperanza bangs her pots and pans every night

To deafening and ostentatious music

But I’m too afraid to confront her about it…

 

To my left lives Alegria:

Something about her ascends the angel within me into the gates of heaven

Is it her skin,

So suntanned –

As if she traveled the world and lived to the fullest?

Or is it her blonde braids –

Bright ropes pulling me into her world?

Whatever it is,

Alegria meditates with her back against the wall every night

To peaceful and amicable music

But I’m too afraid to commend her on it…

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Feel free to check my latest book, a book of poetry called Trials and Tribulations! http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B018ZR0IVA/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1460319936&sr=8-1&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=trials+and+tribulations+sufian

Vulnerable Moments

Hello to my guarded fallen angels! Today was Christmas Day so instead of indulging in my self-pity, like I usually do, I decided to get out the house to hang out with some other young adults in DMHAS. The other clients are fake af. I don’t trust them at all. So the day started off with lunch at Home Town Buffet. I’m friendly with the girls like most gay men are but they were very odd today. It was the usual me-pretending-to-hit-on-them-to-make-the-guys-jealous bit. Dumbing-myself-down-to-associate-with-my-age-group bit. There was this one girl who was pregnant with her Nth child saying she was gonna plot to destroy one of her baby daddies. Yeah… what good is gonna come out of that, am I right? Geez… Then this other girl kept saying things in explicit detail about giving birth while I was eating. I didn’t like that. Also, the guys were observing me for some reason. I felt like the main attraction, “The Lone Homo Exhibit” and shit… I’m the only gay man in the whole program so the other guys usually avoid me or laugh at my dark, humorous jokes. The girls started talking about sex which is a topic I can definitely relate to. I indirectly mentioned that I do one-night-stands with guys I don’t know, which is true. They made these weird faces, even the guys, when I joked about it. So we can talk about nasty straight sex but the second I mention gay sex, it’s weird. And I know for a fact those bitches are hoes too. Today was very weird. Then at one point, I say it’s better off being single and alone but this one guy who knows me a tiny bit better than everyone else, replies that I actually hate being alone. I really didn’t like that for some reason. They kept watching me eat and commenting on every gesture or small movement I did. I usually complain about feeling invisible but maybe invisibility is a blessing and not a curse. I act so arrogant and bitchy around my peers and I was so in that zone that I forgot my “purse” (it’s really just one of those bags with a drawstring) when we left to go to the movie theatre. I was in the middle of watching the latest Star Wars movie when I suddenly realized my “purse” wasn’t on me. I went into the lobby to call one of the staff members to ask if they knew where my “purse” was. They assured me that they found it and put it in their state vehicle for me to get after the movie. The thing is, we all dispersed to watch different movies so our movies ended at different times. The staff I spoke to on the phone before I finished watching The Force Awakens called me back 8 times in a two minute timespan while my phone was on silent. I returned her call but she said she couldn’t wait for me any longer so she left. WTF, right? So the other staff member I’m actually a lot closer to was still in the movie theatre and there were several issues that occurred around the same time. I eventually got my “purse” back but still… Weird days like this makes me very grateful that I have an uneventful, dramaless, lonely life after all. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

The Lonesome Queen

 

The lonesome queen is awaiting her nuptial ride or die,

Pride exudes her for she is perfect where her rival fails,

No longer a change to old routine hanging off a beautiful lie,

 

She beguiles her frilly dresses with french perfume she tends to buy,

Unlike her foe she always has time to manicure her nails,

The lonesome queen is awaiting her nuptial ride or die,

 

There are freshly cut fruit baked into her every homemade pie,

Philanderer prefers no toys to be scattered as his mistress wails,

No longer a change to old routine hanging off a beautiful lie,

 

Until he calls her she fears her plans with him has gone awry,

At times his consort pulls him back so sometimes he bails,

The lonesome queen is awaiting her nuptial ride or die,

 

Her feigned crown keeps her up until sleep is a result of her war cry,

Waiting for his texts is a kind of torture as tears rolls down her rosy cheeks trail,

No longer a change to old routine hanging off a beautiful lie,

 

Work is a waste of time as she anxiously anticipates her high,

As the years go by her heart withers away never to prevail,

The lonesome queen is awaiting her nuptial ride or die,

No longer a change to old routine hanging off a beautiful lie

 

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

The Talk: A Raw Truth

Conception:

When a man and a woman love each other very much…

When a man unconsensually forces himself on a woman…

When a woman is infertile and must resort to artificial insemination…

When a condom breaks and a white elephant looms over two people…

Tribulation:

The number one cause of death is birth…

Your parents cannot shield you from harm forever…

You must learn life lessons the hard way, alone…

Being too sheltered from the real world will make hardship unbearable when you finally do experience it…

Annihilation:

Your first love will destroy your heart in ways you couldn’t fathom prior…

Yet it’s so worth it for it truly is better to have loved and lost than to not…

You grow stronger, wiser, and more resilient from losses rather than victories…

So good luck on your personal endeavors and have a wonderful day, my fallen angels…

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

The Metafiction Approach

I ran down the corridor in haste for no reason. The professor isn’t even here yet. So I decided to unsheath my phone to begin yet another blog post. I’m trying to recall all the new words I learned throughout my searches of other blogs’ contents throughout the week. Man, the sentence before this one was quite a mouthful, huh? I used the word “throughout” twice in one sentence. I don’t think I ever did that before. I hate using the same word more than once in a brief period of time. One by one, other students began to slip into their seats in the panopticon set-up that is the classroom. What is a “panopticon?” Well it’s a systematic way in society for authority to look down on citizens. That sounded subjective though. But in this case, there’s desks that all the students sit in to face the teacher. If that explanation and example wasn’t clear enough for you, then look it up yourself. I just noticed my history professor is five minutes late. Not bad. I hate history class anyway. You’re probably thinking hate is a strong word. If so, then maybe I’ll replace the word “hate” with “dislike” like so: I just noticed my history professor is five minutes late. Not bad. I hate dislike history class anyway. Suddenly this lady walks in holding a couple piles of handouts. My history professor is a guy (probably gay but way too old for me) so maybe our boring lecture will be replaced today. I used the word “replaced” twice now in the whole post. Now I have to go on Google to search for synonyms for “replaced.” I’ll be right back…. Okay, I’m back. “Superceded.” … so maybe our boring class will be replaced superceded today. Eventually, the teacher came in and it seems to me like the lady is a friend of his. They hug and giggle and soon enough, he’s introducing my classmates and I to her. I forget her name as quickly as she says it. I usually don’t bother remembering females’ names for their existence is irrelevant to me. The purpose of her visit was to announce that next week will be Advisory Week. This information is actually quite useful to me so I listen intently, making notes in my train of thought to write down when she leaves. Why did I wait until she left to write down her important words? I look back and I can’t find a plausible way to answer this question. Now my history professor resumes his teachings. US History is such a yawn fest yet as opposed to his prominent humorous personality, the ambience of the lecture hall is at a perfect equilibrium between a mundane curriculum and an outspoken jester teaching it.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Vintage Misery

Theft of a spiritual land is a heinous crime,
Coerced the Natives farther and farther west,
Until they prostrated straight into the Pacific,
Rebellious youth breaks away from its parent kingdom,
Wanted a better life and to enact more fair traditions,
Apples don’t fall too far from the tree however,
Male spectres ruled The New World for quite some time,
Added on to their thievery while kidnapping shadows in Africa,
Forced into manual labor due to repercussions of an estranged nation,
History repeats itself for salvation recalls unsubtle truths,
Shadows are people too and so are daughters of Eve,
Nothing is an issue until catastrophy ensues,
Women’s Rights were next took so long to acknowledge their humanity,
One by one minority groups gradually rose to the zenith,
Sodomized marriage became legal just recently now we know what’s next,
Losing our minds psychological dissociation,
Let’s just skip the steps and accept that we’re all human,
Race and gender and religion and sexual orientation,
Every single person is subject to trials and tribulations regardless,
Perhaps I must wait longer for society to catch up to my mental calibre,
Don’t hold your breath for only immortals and history buffs are ahead of the times,
Blood moons are malevolent omens condemned to detriment,
Deleterious and magnanimous anomalies are both temporary,
If we focused on amelioration rather than portraying a jury,
Mankind will still garner hope for equality like it should have during genesis

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Hetero-crush

She shows shimmering shadows shrouding her shining eyes,
Piercing pondering peek I sneak perpetually perceived,
Beautiful brunette brutality reinvents bountiful brilliance,
Literary little lady lavishingly lessen the labels’ lament,
Creative cat creature cream of the crop cultivating captivation,
Truly tethered to tactical text transcribed tentatively,
Wonderful woman willingly wandering around my world,
Absolutely annointed with abstract antiquity aspiring apparatus,
Madam medley merely making me more and more muddled,
For finally finding a female friend fretting away my faggot finesse

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

Steven Universe took my breath away!

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My new favorite show on Cartoon Network!

Steven Universe is an American animated television series created by Rebecca Sugar for Cartoon Network. It is the coming-of-age story of a young boy named Steven, who grows up with three magical aliens, the “Crystal Gems” Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl, and helps them protect the world from their own kind. A part of Cartoon Network Studios’ artist-driven “Shorts Program”, Steven Universe is the first Cartoon Network series to be created by a woman, and was developed by Sugar while she worked on the Cartoon Network series Adventure Time. It premiered on November 4, 2013.

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The Crystal Gems (from left to right): Pearl, Garnet, Steven, and Amethyst

The series begins with a boy named Steven Universe whose raised by three female aliens who form the group, The Crystal Gems. Garnet is the leader of the group. She’s the powerhouse and most wisest of the team. Pearl acts as the mother to Steven and Amethyst. She specializes in swordplay and is the most agile of the Crystal Gems. Amethyst is the wild child who often plays around with Steven. An aunt-figure to Steven whose weapon of choice is the whip. Steven, himself, is the child of the late Rose Quartz. Like his mother before him, Steven is a kind-hearted and compassionate person who relies on shields, force fields, and healing spit to aid the team. In the first season, he doesn’t know how to control his powers but season two conveys growth in his overall character.

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The show revolves around Steven Universe, a young boy whose learning to harness his power inherited from his mother, Rose Quartz.

The Crystal Gems each have a gem they were born with somewhere on their person. (i.e. Steven’s bellybutton, Garnet’s hands, Pearl’s forehead, Amethyst’s chest). They are not human but part of an alien race composed of entirely female-looking yet asexual creatures who have humanoid bodies. They can develop relationships with each other. Viewers and the media often mistake the show has having to do with lesbian superheroes. Steven is half-human and half-Gem. His father was a human man named Greg and his mother was the former leader of the Crystal Gems before Garnet.

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Steven's parents, Greg and Rose Quartz. Both good people. Beautiful love story!

The love story between Greg and Rose Quartz was very touching. It added a real, emotional aspect to the show. Although Rose didn’t survive Steven’s birth, the show occasionally flashbacks to when she was still alive. Her role in the team, her loving personality, and how she met and fell in love with Steven’s father. As you can see from the pictures, she was a large, pink-haired woman. Beautiful and endearing character who once thought humans were to be seen as pets rather than equals. It wasn’t until she met Greg that she realized the true importance of mankind.

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Rose had to sacrifice her life to give birth to her son, Steven. She was the leader of the Crystal Gems and will be cherished forever!

Present day in Steven Universe, the team fights all sorts of creatures and spontaneous catastrophe. And the bridge between Earth and the Gems’ birthplanet was once severed until the evil ruler of their race starts to invade Earth. Other characters are added into the fray such as Connie (Steven’s love interest), Greg, a pink lion, and so many more! It has its hilarious moments as well as the more serious, heartfelt times where I actually shed a few tears.

Overall, I never thought a show on Cartoon Network can make me feel this way. I thought all the good shows were done like That’s So Raven or Rugrats or Dexter’s Laboratory, but Steven Universe has given me hope that tv shows nowadays are not all doomed to suck. So thanks so much for reading and have a wonderful day, my fallen angels! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

The Scarlet Harlot

Her dress sparkled scarlet underneath the fluorescence,
A mask of leather and lace as if directly from a burlesque house,
She forced herself to get out into the world instead of in slumber,
Awaiting the next beautiful lie to buy her a drink to get her in bed,
It wasn’t her first time at the rodeo but it was her second try at love,
Making love and fornication are two different kinds of pleasure,
She’s had more sexual encounters than she can recall,
But her heart only belonged to one man who was her ride or die,
Unfortunately the latter was proven to be true,
A debut appearance at the masquerade ball,
Sex and love are both addicting yet dangerous indulgences,
She mostly participated as if it’s a recreational means to kill time,
Even the most spontaneous and the most loveless acts of love,
Entwines two souls in a unique way that cannot allow a subtle rebuttal,
Not a virgin when she met him so impure when she met him,
Her soul cut into more and more yet smaller and smaller pieces,
Until peace itself is out of sight and out of mind,
So she stands scarlet clad at the open bar making small talk with the bartender,
Drowning her sorrow and eager at another attempt the fill the void,
She wanted the real true love but another one night stand will suffice,
At least that’s what she told herself,
Music played so debonair shielded from the nocturnal breeze,
Bodies sway to the melody while lyrics are suffocated in ecstasy,
Some escaped the crowd to achieve orgasm at their earliest convenience,
Others decided to stay and let the suspense build until the unveiling,
The woman wondered if the masks disguising their faces really mattered,
She knew who was male and who was female,
Names were nothing their pasts difficult to disect with conversation,
Accusations and assumptions were rarely correct with reason,
She wore her heart on her cheek but one kiss is not what man seek,
Never enough to satisfy permanently only a temporary fix,
Soon enough it was a minute before midnight,
Wasted time waned without bearing her soul on the dancefloor,
Waiting instead of taking action in fear of picking the wrong man,
But in doing nothing no experience is gained for once burned,
Big Ben began to rang a burdensome sound,
She watched as the men and women tore off their falsehood,
But she did not do the same for fear and anxiety rendered her from doing so,
For the law of allowance she loved to ignore within the folds of her dress

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂

What stops them from doing that to you?

Good evening, my reliable fallen angels! So let’s get to it! Have you ever had a friend who did horrible things to someone else but you never thought they would do those things to you? You think you’re their only exception? You’re a fool if you said yes to either of those questions. From a fool to a fool, I am letting you know that no one will ever make you their only exception. Don’t get me wrong; I learned this lesson in high school. I mention it today because my brother is learning that life lesson at this point in his life. His fiancee and her family would gossip about everyone. When I say everyone, I mean everyone. When my brother’s sister-in-law’s boyfriend cheated on her, the family talked a lot of shit about him. That got me thinking. “What stops them from doing that to you?” But my brother didn’t listen. They’re broken up now. I bet they’re talking shit about my brother a mile a minute. I told him it’s out of his control. That’s the third spiritual law. Law of acceptance is to accept that nothing is in your control but yourself. He simply stopped loving her. No one cheated. There was no domestic violence. Nothing. His ex-fiancee treated him terribly. That’s what I hate about some women. They think men don’t have feelings. In society, men can’t cry or express any emotions without someone telling them to “be a man!” It breaks my heart when my dad or my brother were treated badly by the women in their lives. And the second the man decides they’ve had enough, the woman forever raises their child to hate their father. And on top of that, they don’t let the father see the child. What the hell is the man supposed to do? I’m glad I’m gay. Some women would be too much for me. I’ve had my fair share of men in my life and I notice we handle conflict differently. If me and some guy go through a break-up, I know for a fact I’m never gonna hear from him again. Men neglect while women gossip. I don’t know which is worse. Sorry if I sound sexist. My experiences with women are usually disastrous. Now that I think about, men are pretty bad too. Which is why I don’t understand why some people hate the LGBT Community. Men and women are both terrible. Pick your fucking poison! Anyway, back to the main topic at hand. If you find that your boyfriend or girlfriend or ever just a friend act ill-mannered towards other people, you can easily become one of those other people. That is a kind of red flag that you have to look out for. I learned this lesson years ago and my brother is learning it now. It’s one of the trials and tribulations every person will go through. I’m just starting to get into The Bible and I realize that every life lesson is displayed clearly in there. Well, not that clearly. Most Bibles are still in Old English. But still, our lives, mankind’s destiny, has literally been written down already. Life is ironic that way. Well I hope this post helped someone out today. Then again, most people have to learn things the hard way. Have a wonderful day! Over and out.

Feel free to like or comment on this post. I will always reply back to comments! And please check out my eBook: http://www.amazon.com/dp/B012BSPFCQ/ref=cm_sw_r_fa_awdm_EgmSvb1FDR2EB Thanks for reading 🙂